Time
Cedo has the soul of the dead sea and dirt in his eyes
When we plant peppers
And catch butterflies
We would laugh and play
Because with cedo, time felt unlimited
When we were in his green garden
the peppers were screaming to be picked
He told me stories of the old country
And the little boy who sat upon the hill
Dreamt about fighting for the nation
A good future for me was important to him
For he was once a boy with talent that was hidden
he saw past the shy shell covering my strengths
And I was then, under a tree on a hill, dreaming to be a lawyer
Everyday was a fun day with cedo
We would either eat until our stomachs were full
Or watch the elephant on TV, degrade our own people
But something changed.
His demeanor was different-sick, sad drained.
his own son had vanished from the Earth.
We weren’t hugging out of happiness, we were now hugging out of sadness
time with his family was valuable
Because time was no longer unlimited
It is a stick of dynamite, waiting to explode.

jenna i love this poem s much. i like how you opened up about your uncle and your life. good job!!!!!! love you!
ReplyDeleteI thought it was her grandpa
Deletethank you
DeleteSidney: I talked about my grandpa towards the end
Deletei like how you were saying grandpa in a different way also how each stanza was an opportunity to learn something knew about your grandpa
ReplyDeleteGreat job, Jenna! I love this poem and how you incorporated your culture into it with the word "Cedo" I really think this was a well-thought out poem and I loved the rhyme scheme you had!
ReplyDeletethank you
DeleteI think you did very good on it. I like how you acknowledged your grandpa and your Arabic language.
ReplyDeleteJenna, you did really well. By focusing on one thing and making it valuable shows maturity. This was something that seems as if you spent your time on it. Nice job!!
ReplyDeletethank you
DeleteBraun-I thought you did a good job revealing your culture, and who you are with people you are closer to. Is your Grandfather still alive? If so do you still talk to him like you used to?
ReplyDeleteDarryl-
ReplyDeleteI really liked how you said grandpa in a different language
The end of the poem was really amazing, it screamed power which was my favorite part. Another part that I really liked was the elephant. It represented how republican's "downgrade"(they like to say they are keeping people safe) your people which put in a little of modern day into your poem.
ReplyDeleteQuestion for you: Did your grandpa die, When, and if not to personal how?
He didn't die, he's still alive, when i was talking about a death a referred to my uncle
DeleteI like how you represented your culture with the word cedo.
ReplyDelete-kahleelah muhammad
I liked how you included your own language in this poem and included times with your grandpa. I liked the personification and metaphors you used in your poem. I think you could have included more about what cedo liked about you.
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
DeleteI like how you used an Arabic word instead of English. Your poem was very good, I enjoyed it.
ReplyDeleteGiorgina- i loved your poem i liked how you told us about your grandpa and we got to know you more because of it
ReplyDeletei liked your poem. i liked the picture you used. it was unique. i liked how you said cedo instead of grandfather.
ReplyDeleteFloyd- I liked how you changed grandpa to edo because he is different to you than any grandpa. I also liked how you remembered him so much. Is he still alive?
ReplyDeleteJenna,
ReplyDeleteThis was a beautiful poem, and I am most struck by your growth as a poet over the course of this unit. You accurately capture the fragile and delicate nature of life, and how we cannot take moments with our loved ones for granted. I thought you did a nice job of showing, not telling throughout. This was true in your description of Donald Trump, and memories which only you hold the key to.
The image is also simple, but powerful, especially coupled with your description.
Excellent job. Very proud of this effort.
I liked how you said that there was a shell covering your strengths and that your grandfather could see past it unlike anyone else. But who were you talking about when you said that there was an elephant on your TV ?
ReplyDeleteI was referring to Donald Trump, he is a republican and their symbol is an elephant
DeleteMalayjah- Were you talking about your grandpa dying? and also i liked how you used picture that was taken i your grandpa's garden.
ReplyDeleteNo my grandpa is alive, when i was talking about death it was referring to my uncle
DeleteRichard- I really liked how your poem was talking about your grandpa and how you called him Cedo.
ReplyDeletecahlil i think it was very good and is your grandpa still living and i like how you switch
ReplyDeleteyour grandpa and put i in diff language
Rashaad- I like how you chose the picture of your Grandfathers Garden to represent something that relates to him and something that he likes to do. The picture explains a lot with the content of the poem which tells a lot about him.
ReplyDeleteRashaad- I like how you chose the picture of your Grandfathers Garden to represent something that relates to him and something that he likes to do. The picture explains a lot with the content of the poem which tells a lot about him.
ReplyDelete